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diamondjim
StatFox Hall of Famer

Registered: Sep 2005
Posts: 6974

BLONDE JOKE

A blind man wanders into an all girls biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the waiter, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"

The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is only fair -- given that you are blind -- that you should know five things:

1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6 foot tall, 175 lb. blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.

Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"

The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, "No ... not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."




@1diamondjim (twitter)
Location : Boston, Mass

Old Post 08-18-07 12:17 AM
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SliPKnuT
FoxDen Hall of Famer

Registered: Feb 2006
Posts: 2512

Lot's of good chuckles here...

Funny Ads




"The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling."

Ambrose Bierce

Old Post 08-19-07 02:06 AM
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tdbabe
StatFox Hall of Famer

Registered: Oct 2003
Posts: 7262

Those were great.......I love creative and funny ads!

Confess, how many times did you watch the Napster one? lol




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Old Post 08-19-07 02:33 AM
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SliPKnuT
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Registered: Feb 2006
Posts: 2512

Axe | The Gamekillers (Case)



Gamekillers

Tdbabe,

I am currently signing up for Napster. Something is forcing me to do this. Talk about good marketing LOL!!

Old Post 08-19-07 02:35 AM
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SliPKnuT
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Registered: Feb 2006
Posts: 2512

Hungover




"The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling."

Ambrose Bierce

Old Post 08-20-07 01:32 AM
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Bytore
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Registered: Jan 2003
Posts: 15337

That was totally funny!!!

Nothing like a little axe humor...




"Today's Tom Sawyer, he gets high on you
And the space he invades, he gets by on you..."

RUSH

Old Post 08-20-07 02:18 AM
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hightimes
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Registered: Dec 2006
Posts: 6734

Bytore will you stop being...............

so anti-social hanging out by yourself in the "special" room. We are all having fun discussing matters of great importance and you are sitting alone. come out and enjoy the party. you will have fun i promise......... lol

Old Post 08-20-07 02:20 AM
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SliPKnuT
FoxDen Hall of Famer

Registered: Feb 2006
Posts: 2512

Here's a little Chicago Cubs rain delay humor.

Will Ferrell as Harry Caray




"The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling."

Ambrose Bierce

Old Post 08-20-07 03:05 AM
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Bytore
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Registered: Jan 2003
Posts: 15337

I am indeed a little "anti-social" Hightimes.

How could you tell??? lol!!!

You sure you all won't beat me up??? lol!

My dream...

To see an American college football game. I know, such a silly dream...

You will have to take of the old man! lol!!!

I was too social in the past maybe, my good friend tells me...

And their are beer flies every where. This myth is true. lol!!!

Fn' fruit flies, out after my last drink...




"Today's Tom Sawyer, he gets high on you
And the space he invades, he gets by on you..."

RUSH

Old Post 08-20-07 03:25 AM
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Bytore
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Registered: Jan 2003
Posts: 15337

That was totally funny SliPKnut!!!

42 years ago???

How tine flies. lol!!!




"Today's Tom Sawyer, he gets high on you
And the space he invades, he gets by on you..."

RUSH

Old Post 08-20-07 04:00 AM
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SliPKnuT
FoxDen Hall of Famer

Registered: Feb 2006
Posts: 2512

3 Super Tips




"The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling."

Ambrose Bierce

Old Post 08-20-07 04:22 AM
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SliPKnuT
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Registered: Feb 2006
Posts: 2512

Catching fruit flies...Bytore,

Placing vinegar or spoiled fermenting items into a bottle and putting a paper or metal disposable funnel into the top of the bottle. This would allow the flies to enter but supposedly get confused and not be able to get out. This was the preferred method for the catch/release idealists.

Catch fruit flies (Drosophila) with vinegar




"The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling."

Ambrose Bierce

Old Post 08-20-07 04:30 AM
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Bytore
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Registered: Jan 2003
Posts: 15337

I sure loved the "Super Tips!!!".


LOL!

Talk about being a cheap bastard...




"Today's Tom Sawyer, he gets high on you
And the space he invades, he gets by on you..."

RUSH

Old Post 08-20-07 04:48 AM
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SliPKnuT
FoxDen Hall of Famer

Registered: Feb 2006
Posts: 2512

goofy show on abc "Just for Laughs"

Similar to Candid Camera.

I'm getting a few gigs out of it.

Power of 10 aint too bad either.




"The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling."

Ambrose Bierce

Old Post 08-22-07 02:02 AM
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SliPKnuT
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Registered: Feb 2006
Posts: 2512

I would watch world series of pokers new episode if it wasn't on 20,000 times over the next few years.




"The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling."

Ambrose Bierce

Old Post 08-22-07 02:07 AM
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tdbabe
StatFox Hall of Famer

Registered: Oct 2003
Posts: 7262

A woman was very distraught over the fact that she had not had a date or any sex for over 5 years. She was afraid she might have something wrong with her so she decided to seek the medical expertise of the well known Chinese sex therapist, Dr. Chang.

Upon entering the examination room, Dr. Chang said, "OK, take off all your crose."

The woman did as she was told.

"Now, get down and craw reery, reery fass to odder side of room."

Again, the woman did as she was instructed.

Dr. Chang then said, "OK, now craw reery, reery fass back to me."

As she did, Dr. Chang shook his head slowly. "Your probrem vewy bad.
You haf Ed Zachary Disease. Worse case I ever see. Dat why you not haf
sex or dates.

The woman asked anxiously, "Oh my God, Dr. Chang, what is Ed Zachary Disease?"

Dr. Chang sighed deeply and replied, "Ed Zachary Disease is when your face look Ed Zachary like your ass




Please view this site. Donations of any kind are always appreciated by these brave people.

http://www.anysoldier.com/index.cfm

America is not at war. The U.S. Military is at war. America is at the Mall. If you don't stand behind our troops, PLEASE feel free to stand in front of them!

Remember, Freedom isn't Free, thousands have paid the price so you can enjoy what you have today.

Old Post 08-24-07 05:43 AM
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SliPKnuT
FoxDen Hall of Famer

Registered: Feb 2006
Posts: 2512

Meet the Parents Producer...

"Once I was pulled over"




"The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling."

Ambrose Bierce

Old Post 08-25-07 09:03 AM
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tdbabe
StatFox Hall of Famer

Registered: Oct 2003
Posts: 7262

I wonder if EMO is related to ELMO. lol Clever guy....."he said cut it out!.....I said......" lol




Please view this site. Donations of any kind are always appreciated by these brave people.

http://www.anysoldier.com/index.cfm

America is not at war. The U.S. Military is at war. America is at the Mall. If you don't stand behind our troops, PLEASE feel free to stand in front of them!

Remember, Freedom isn't Free, thousands have paid the price so you can enjoy what you have today.

Old Post 08-25-07 09:20 AM
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SliPKnuT
FoxDen Hall of Famer

Registered: Feb 2006
Posts: 2512

Elmo is so smart and weird I'm scared to even post his genius...

He's a secret. He's worth delving into.

Not sure about posting him further in here?

I am all about the "weird".

This is the sane"ist" site ever!

Emo is a genius. Surf on your own!




"The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling."

Ambrose Bierce

Old Post 08-25-07 09:33 AM
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SliPKnuT
FoxDen Hall of Famer

Registered: Feb 2006
Posts: 2512

GI JOE Parody Video Collection Part 1

GI JOE Parody Video Collection Part 1




"The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling."

Ambrose Bierce

Old Post 08-29-07 11:38 PM
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