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Breadman
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Registered: Jan 2003
Posts: 6075

This really fit blonde moved in next door last week so was compelled to introduce myself and ask her out, but she just called me a creepy **** and stormed off.

I don't know why though, I was nothing but nice.

I even told her I loved the way her hair smelled when she's sleeping




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 06-13-20 11:03 PM
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Breadman
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Registered: Jan 2003
Posts: 6075

Driving home today, my wife was boasting about how good women are at multi-tasking, and how there's "No two things a man can do simultaneously that a woman can't".

I just sat there, scratching my balls as I reversed onto the driveway.




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 06-14-20 02:27 AM
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Breadman
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Registered: Jan 2003
Posts: 6075

Garrett
The driver😅😅😅😅

Bris inside a Royal Deluxe II from Saturday Night Live on Vimeo
https://vimeo.com/312218800




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 06-19-20 11:34 PM
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Breadman
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Posts: 6075

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ndWx0-4A518




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 06-22-20 08:06 PM
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Breadman
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Posts: 6075

Don't do it JIMMY!!!!

https://youtu.be/E1By6Wj_sAU




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 06-24-20 04:50 AM
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Breadman
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https://youtu.be/i5jTH89HjTA




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 06-26-20 12:00 AM
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Breadman
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https://www.netflix.com/title/70213237




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 07-01-20 01:33 AM
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Breadman
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https://youtu.be/85T2vIV1N-k




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 07-06-20 05:23 PM
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Breadman
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Posts: 6075

https://youtu.be/OdqvXHCtW7g




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 07-10-20 09:56 AM
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Breadman
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https://gfycat.com/masculinecompassionatediscus-funny




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 07-10-20 11:53 AM
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Breadman
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gPUcFTyW9-w&feature=youtu.be&t=6




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 07-15-20 08:34 PM
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Breadman
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Cruelty to animals 😁

Dirty Harry on feminism and women's quotas - YouTube

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=9rcIJIWqYmo




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 07-18-20 06:36 PM
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Breadman
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Larry passed away. His will provided $30,000 for an elaborate funeral.
As the last guests departed the affair, his wife, Helen, turned to her oldest friend Jody.
"Well, I'm sure Larry would be pleased," she said.

"I'm sure you're right," replied Jody, who lowered her voice and leaned in close.
How much did this really cost?"
"All of it," said Helen. "Thirty thousand."
"No!" Jody exclaimed. "I mean, it was very nice, but $30,000?"

Helen answered. "The funeral was $6,500. I donated $500 to the synagogue ._ The shiva, food and drinks were another $500. The rest went for the _memorial stone."
Jody computed quickly. "$22,500 for a memorial stone? My God, how big is it?!"




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 07-21-20 03:29 AM
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Breadman
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Stone is 2 and 1/2 carats




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 07-21-20 03:30 AM
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Breadman
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https://youtu.be/ycWn87zrWOo




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 07-22-20 06:20 PM
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Breadman
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Posts: 6075

A man is sitting in the window seat of a plane ready for take off when a man with a German Shepard board and take the middle and aisle seats.

Upset the first man asks why the second gentleman was allowed to bring his dog on the plane? The second man answers I am a DEA agent and this is my sniffer dog to
tell me if there is contraband on the plane. As soon as we take off, I’ll show you.
After take off the DEA agent says to the dog - first class. The dog jumps out of his seat runs down the aisle to first class and sits down next to a women. The Dea agents nods to the dog
it runs back to him puts his right paw on the agent’s arm then sits back down on the middle seat. The DEA agent says to the first man that means the woman has pot. I’ll make a note of her seat and phone ahead. We will arrest her when we land. A few minutes late the agents says middle of the plane. The dog jumps down runs to the middle of the plane sits down next to a man. The agent nods to the dog , the dog runs back puts his left paw on the agents arm and sits back down. The agent says to the first man that means he found Cocaine so we will arrest him too.
A few minutes later the agents says to the dog back of the plane. The dog jumps down runs to the back of the plane stops for a second then turns and runs back, jumps on the seat and proceeds to take a big dump.
The first man totally disgusted says what’s that supposed to mean? The agent says - he found a bomb.




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 07-30-20 03:01 PM
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Breadman
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Registered: Jan 2003
Posts: 6075

The majority of these are hilarious. Worth the time👍

10 Funny European Commercials - YouTube
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=V4PfRI2f96s




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 07-30-20 05:14 PM
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Breadman
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Posts: 6075

They should have a virtual Ron Artest go up into the stands and beat the **** out of a virtual fan. Make things more entertaining.




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 08-03-20 07:23 PM
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Breadman
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Registered: Jan 2003
Posts: 6075

A husband leans over and asks his wife, "Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago?"




"We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you."

"Yes", she says, "I remember it well."

OK, he says, "How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?"

"Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!"

A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I've got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble. So he follows them.

The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks. Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers. As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in.. Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the policeman has ever seen. This goes on for about ten minutes while both are making loud noises and moaning and screaming. Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground.

The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about life and old age that he didn't know.

After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on. The policeman, is still watching and thinks to himself, this is truly amazing, I've got to ask them what their secret is.

So, as the couple passes, he says to them, "Excuse me, but that was something else. You must've had a fantastic sex life together. Is there some sort of secret to this?"

Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply,

"Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence."




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 09-01-20 08:04 PM
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Breadman
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Posts: 6075

“PC people simply don’t understand this business about context because they tend to be very literal-minded,” Cleese continued. “I would love to debate this with a ‘woke’. The first question I would say is, ‘Can you tell me a woke joke?’ I don’t know what a woke joke would be like other than very, very nice people being kind to each other. It might be heart-warming but it’s not going to be very funny.”

https://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/tv/news/john-cleese-political-correctness-comedy-woke-bbc-fawlty-towers-a9702986.html




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ

https://i.imgur.com/02QbIyb.jpg

Old Post 09-04-20 04:52 PM
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